In this passion and potential podcast episode, I spontaneously turn to random pages in the Amanda Lovelace books (“Break Your Glass Slippers” and “Shine Your Icy Crown”) and share my thoughts on some of her quotes and opinions. Lovelace is a very empowering woman who shares about her growth, trauma, and wisdom. Her books have truly helped me through some of my hardest times and i find so much inspiration in her writing and her quotes. Throughout this episode and blog article, I talk through finding yourself, the decision to embrace unapologetic self-love, and loving yourself first in relationships.
I used to lower my vibration drastically to fit into circles, relationships and situations where I thought I might be more accepted if I was a lesser version of myself. Lowering my vibration only left me feeling extremely misunderstood, and painfully lonely. Suppressing a huge part of myself resulted in feeling like a lesser version of myself.
Some examples of times this would come are :
I lacked confidence anytime I talked about my endeavors. What I learned through my experiences in these toxic circles is that if people truly care about you and your growth as a human, they’re going to support you and be excited for you when you chase after your passions. You don’t have to relate to somebody to support them being the best version of themself.
“I don’t know who needs to hear this, but it’s okay if someone doesn’t like you. It doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. It doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with them. Some kinds of magic don’t call to each other.”
As a chronic people pleaser, I’ve always struggled with ruffling feathers. If someone didn’t like me, I felt like I was disappointing them. life has taught me that not everyone is meant to be on the same wavelength and not everyone is meant to understand each other. It is absolutely okay if not everyone likes you. Be your unapologetic self and if you vibe with someone, great. However, if you don’t, that’s not your person and you’re not theirs, and it’s no big deal.
“If I decide to be with you, it’s not because I think you complete me. I’m already a complete spiritual being without anybody’s help. If I’m with you, it’s because I think you let in more stardust than storm clouds. That’s what I look for.”
I believe that you have to love yourself before you can really love someone else. It’s not always easy, but if you’re relying on someone else to make you feel whole, I think you’re always going to feel a little bit lost and misunderstood.
For me personally, anytime I lost myself in a relationship it was because I was not understanding myself and loving myself first. I lost sight of who I wanted to be and instead of being unapologetically myself, I was trying to let another person complete me in an inauthentic way.
It’s wonderful to allow someone in and open your heart to them, but you have to open your heart to yourself first.
“She refuses to be only someone else’s daughter, She refuses to be only someone else’s sister, She refuses to be only someone else’s girlfriend, She refuses to be only someone else’s wife. She refuses to be only someone else’s mother. Her potential knows no bounds. Big sister says: Make them rue the day they underestimated you.”
All I have to say is girl was ON FIRE in these books. In the first she’s heartbroken and traumatized. She puts in the hard self-work and by the second book, she’s ready to demolish.
If you enjoyed these quotes, check out more of Amanda Lovelace’s work here!
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Until next time my friends – Arastasia
PS – want to check out some other episodes? Click here.
Sincerely, your artsy friend that is rooting for you,
Arastasia Rolain – Traveling Mural Artist, Art Educator, & Creative Entrepreneur